Things seem to be running smoothly in Malawi. Mabvuto and I have put in place some measures to help facilitate better communication and increased trust. He has now agreed to help me find a place to stay in Malawi. If need be, I can pay for a motel for the time I am there.
I have obtained the phone number for Mrs Catuluka, the lady who tried to steal water. Although it seems silly to trust her, I know I can get informaiton from her that I can cross reference with Mabvuto’s reports.
I have asked my friend Azikiwe to be part of the project. He will periodically check on the orphans. He has also agreed to have all email correspondence copied to him. This will help to insure open and honest reports.
I have no reason to believe that I have been lied to or cheated by mabvuto. So far all of his reports and information seems legitimate. I have put in place these measures to make sure that the orphan care continues to thrive. I may not return to Malawi every summer and I need to know that if Mabvuto is transferred to a different work location the orphans will not be left without support.
I plan to travel to Ntcheu for about 3 or 4 weeks in July. I hope to do some other traveling in Malawi this year. I would like to teach at a school so that I can form a stronger bond with the people. I feel that last year I was very isolated. I want to be more visible this year.
I am feeling more positive than I have in a long time. I am hopeful that things will continue to be ok. My personal relationships will change but I am certain the orphans will still thrive.
Many of you have expressed concern over these recent posts. I should explain that I have been writing them as a way of being open and honest with all of you. It has not been my intention to solicit sympathy or to discourage anyone from helping the children. I just wanted people to know that my life in Malawi is not just about the orphans. I didn’t go there and experience the sheer joy of giving. I started this orphan care as a way of bringing health and education to children but also as a way of giving myself a sense of fulfillment and joy. I want everyone to know that this project has been difficult for me personally. It has been a struggle and a learning experience. I will finish the purging here with one last post. I will try to leave you with a sense of hope.
There are many personal issues which I am trying to work through in terms of this project. I am dealing with a man who is basically good but has some issues with self-esteem and trust. I have ideas in my mind about how to make the orphan care work. I will continue to do some soul searching. I will find a way to continue to help the children of Malawi. It may look much different than it does this year. It may move to a different location in Malawi. It will likely mean I will take a financial loss but I have to consider my own personal safety and well-being as well as the health and welfare of the kids.
I want you all to know that I am very sorry for using poor judgment. I should have moved more slowly. I should have been more careful and less trusting. I want you all to know that I have done my best. I will continue to do my best. I will continue to be as honest with you as I can be. I hope you will see me as a person with flaws but who is trying her best.
Thank you for reading.
